I've known you for a long time and I thought that we could tell
each other anything, but now I know it isn't true. I knew that
your condition was worsening, but I didn't know it was so bad.
I found out that you had cancer the other day. You tried to hide
it from me, but I found the chemo dates in that pocket in your
bag you thought hid everything from the world. From me. From
me, your only trusted person in the universe. And that's not all
Those chemotherapy dates were expired, past. You've been through
maybe six or seven tests now. And I talked to your doctor about
it and he told me that you have maybe three weeks left at most.
And I didn't cry when I came back because I knew that you would
know where I had been.
And there's only four days left. I've been visiting your doctor
every day and there's only four days left. I know you're getting
suspicious of me, but I can't help but feel the same. Why won't
you tell me? The birthday cake I made for you (chocolate, your
favorite. I know..) That cake is rotting in the fridge, waiting
to be eaten on the special day it will never get to see.
I can't stand to think what my life would be like without you,
I can't. You've been there for me and saved my life so many times
and when it's my turn to save yours, I can't. I can't do anything
else for you except be there at your funeral, your eyes no longer
seeing, your face pale and cold, your body missing the life you
used to own, the life you used to share with
I don't want you to leave, I can't let you leave, please stay, at
least for a while longer stay long enough so we can celebrate the
memories you gave me and the happy times and the sad times that you
helped me through and that day when I twisted my ankle and you
bought me chocolate ice cream before going home and when I first met
you and I can't handle anything without you. Please don't leave.